Even though Wendy thinks I done something with the votes, I assure you all I did not tamper with them in any way, its just clear to say that we all think you are 100% going to piss yourself!
Tuesday, 26 May 2009
Friday, 22 May 2009
Thailand jail here we come!
As if things were not bad enough I read this crazy shit in the papers this morning!! I heard that you can get arrested for spitting your chewing gum out on the street, but stealing a bar mat, that’s just wrong!
Its not like the bar mats really belong to the bar, I mean the punters pay for the alcohol which pays for the bat mats, glasses and ashtrays; along with the rest of the place! Its out right that we can take this stuff home as a souvenir! Who wants to go to the local souvenir store and pick up some ashtrays for presents to bring back home when you can lift a load from the local bars, wash them out in your hotel sink and wrap in some skid marked boxers for the journey home? It wasn’t even an ashtray, it was a beer mat!! I am beginning to fear that I will not make it out of Thailand without spending a day or two in jail.
I hope to fuck you don’t get done for pissing in the street or Wendy’s fucked. Although is pissing yourself in the street the same as taking down your pants and pissing.. you might be OK Wendy!
Its not like the bar mats really belong to the bar, I mean the punters pay for the alcohol which pays for the bat mats, glasses and ashtrays; along with the rest of the place! Its out right that we can take this stuff home as a souvenir! Who wants to go to the local souvenir store and pick up some ashtrays for presents to bring back home when you can lift a load from the local bars, wash them out in your hotel sink and wrap in some skid marked boxers for the journey home? It wasn’t even an ashtray, it was a beer mat!! I am beginning to fear that I will not make it out of Thailand without spending a day or two in jail.
I hope to fuck you don’t get done for pissing in the street or Wendy’s fucked. Although is pissing yourself in the street the same as taking down your pants and pissing.. you might be OK Wendy!
Tuesday, 19 May 2009
Update so far
Ok, seriously though, just thought i'd update all our followers (i.e andrew the ninja) on progress to date. Asia Part 1 is Hong Kong for 2 nights: Asia Part 2 is Taiwan for 6 nights: Asia Part 3 is Phuket for 9 nights. I have this week managed to negotiate a good deal (i hope - exchange rates permitting) on the luxury 5-star Twin Palms Resort & Spa, Phuket. Looks lovely, doesn't it. Can't bleedin' wait for all of it - i bet the cocktails are yummy at that blue bar!Saw this, and thought of Garuth...
I was browsing away on the net today, when i happened to come across a picture of a particular haemmoroid remedy. What you might ask, does this have to do with our imminent travels to Asia - well, i guess nothing really, but something tells me that a certain travelling companion who is known to be prone to "anal grapes" will be stockpiling the Anusol Plus for inclusion in the suitcase. Oh how immensly funny would it be if the Anusol Plus was to "go missing" when one needed it the most..............
One for the road....
What a random load of bullocks! Wee cousin has requested some home comforts brought all the way from the sunny UK. I completely understand the Buckfast, but fuck sake; tomato puree… it’s a strange world we live in! I mean why the hell doesn’t Taiwan sell Buckfast and tomato puree????I have seen the light!
This think is actually quite addictive; I don’t really have anything to write, I just thought I would put a wee picture on.
I don’t really get what Wendy is worried about the drink for?!!? I mean look at this fine picture, does it not look like a bloke that can handle his drink and would be refused access to a lounge with free booze 3 hours prior to his flight?
On a more serious note though this picture has put me off drink!! Not for life, so you never know in 178 days I could be up for a good old drink!!
I don’t really get what Wendy is worried about the drink for?!!? I mean look at this fine picture, does it not look like a bloke that can handle his drink and would be refused access to a lounge with free booze 3 hours prior to his flight?
On a more serious note though this picture has put me off drink!! Not for life, so you never know in 178 days I could be up for a good old drink!!
Monday, 18 May 2009
Its all too much
Well to keep the blog exciting, I have added a poll to the right hand side. I just know Wendy will love it when she sees it!
Its her turn to put one on next week... I can't imagine what it will be!!
Its her turn to put one on next week... I can't imagine what it will be!!
Just to clarify things....
You may have read in the previous post a reference to me wetting myself - i would just like to clarify, I AM NOT INCONTINENT!
bye for now
wendy
bye for now
wendy
Oh no...
Wendy doesn’t have a clue how to update this.. it could just be the voice of reasoning here that will be updating the blog!!! Only 179 days to go before we make an attempt to make it out of Heathrow’s free booze lounge never mind a 12 or 14 hour flight were again they will be throwing free drink at us!! I do not like the sounds of this as although I can control my alcohol intake I am a little worried about Wendy and her incapability to hold her own piss when she has had too much drink. Never mind the drugs and injections that are needed to visit this far off land, I think some Tenaladies or adult pampers are what’s needed!!!
Don’t know if I will update daily, if Wendy gets the hang of it I promise it will get more exciting!!! (Garuth)
Don’t know if I will update daily, if Wendy gets the hang of it I promise it will get more exciting!!! (Garuth)
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